Tag Archives: Covid

My PI Cancer Adventure – Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

Part 6

Part 7

Early in the pandemic last year I speculated to several friends, “What if you got genuinely sick with something other than Covid? What would you do?” You see, the way the heath care system works in Dumaguete (and similarly throughout the Philippines) is that the local hospitals handle the basics, and so far I have been reasonably impressed with medical care in Dumaguete. But if you need something major – heart surgery or sophisticated cancer treatments, for example – they send you to Manila or Cebu City. No big deal; a quick flight or longer ferry ride. So that was my plan when I moved to the Philippines. Who could have imagined when I made those prognostications, that they would impact me so directly?

I just turned 68 and have been pretty damn healthy my whole life. Not a broken bone or a stitch on my body. Never a surgery other than something that was done to me when I was an infant.

For these reasons it was easy to be somewhat cavalier about my health. Sure, I started going for an annual physical before age 50 but generally in the US that is little more than blood work and taking your vitals.

Nonetheless there are three things I keep some track of and worry a bit about. My PSA test, which checks prostate health (my father and uncle both had prostate cancer and survived it). Secondly, colonoscopies; those fun little things that I have had 4 times already, mostly because I have a brother who died of colon cancer. I am due for my 5th one of these later this year – can’t wait. BTW, if anyone watched the AFI Lifetime Achievement Award given last year to Diane Keaton, Woody Allen did the greatest joke about colonoscopies ever. Go watch it on YouTube. https://youtu.be/S8AAYTDf87Y

And the final area of concern is – my skin. I’m fair skinned, used to be red-headed, and burned often as a kid. As an adult I discovered that sunscreen actually works and became addicted to the highest SPF I could find; usually 100 or more. Because of burns I hated the beach as a kid. Ironic that I would move to the Philippines and now very much like swimming in the ocean.

Nonetheless when I had my last physical exam in the US before moving to the Philippines I asked the doctor about the spots on my face and whether they were just age or what. I don’t think he would have said anything if I hadn’t asked, but I did so he recommended a visit to a dermatologist. So, for the first time in my life I went to a doctor who I believed mostly existed to cut off moles and pop zits. The dermatologist explained that the small spots were pre-cancerous and could readily be removed by freezing them off with liquid nitrogen. It was quick and not too painful. The doctor also took a small sample for a biopsy which came back negative. When I told the doctor that I was moving to the Philippines she recommended finding a dermatologist and getting an annual exam and freezing.

About six months after I arrived in Dumaguete I found a dermatologist and went for a checkup. The office at Tru Dermotologie was clean and upscale, the staff bright and knowledgeable. The doctor, trained in Canada, had me strip and examined all my skin. After that she froze off spots on my face and top of my head, where the red hair used to protect me. All quick and professional, though by Philippines standards a bit pricey. I have come back annually.

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Last year I noticed her office opened and closed often because of Covid. Finally they re-opened in November and I decided I’d better go before they closed again. The routine was the same: strip, examine and freeze off those pesky spots. The total price, between the examination and the spraying, was somewhere close to 7k. Nonetheless I felt good about doing the right thing for myself.

Now, once the spraying is done the spots scab over and the highly attractive scabs take 7-10 days to fall off. But this time there was one on my nose that didn’t seem to want to come off. It looked weird and felt weird for a scab and it grew out of a small bump on my nose that I’d had for perhaps 5 years; something that I’d previously been told was common and not to worry about.

But after a few weeks I did worry and returned to the doctor. “This scab isn’t falling off and seems to be growing,” I said. “It’s not a scab,” she said and gave me a Latin term for what it was.

The next day I returned to have the thing suctioned out. Because of Covid the doctor was dressed in an outfit that covered her head and was sort of a cross between a bee keepers mask and something NASA would have invented. The devices used to suction were modern and sort of reminded me of what you might see in a dentists office. No cutting – just suctioning and then cauterizing the wound left behind. The doctor took material to do a biopsy but touched the area and told me she was pretty confident based on feel that it was not cancer. A sample was sent to the lab and I was told 4-6 weeks to get the results. That didn’t concern me because I was so confident it was nothing.

I should have known that something was very wrong when the results came back in 2 weeks. I went back to the doctor only to be told that the results were inconclusive; it might or it might not be a squamous cell carcinoma. The doctor was torn with whether to ask the lab to do another test. She actually was worried about spending my money or perhaps worried that I would think she was taking advantage of me. I assured her I could afford the tests and to please do whatever was best. In the end she decided I should come back in two weeks by which time the scab would be gone and she could examine the wound and perhaps take another sample of the affected area.

But in 2 weeks the scab was not gone. I had soaked it a couple times a day as asked and even rubbed it to get the scab off. Some of it did come off but then to my dismay it grew back. When I returned in 2 weeks and showed the doctor my nose she knew it was skin cancer. “Don’t we want to get another biopsy?” I asked. “I’m 99% sure,” she said.

We discussed the options. I could get it cut out by a plastic surgeon and perhaps that could be done in Dumaguete or I could go to Manila and have modern microsurgery, called MOHS. “Manila? There’s nowhere else?” I asked. “No.”

The outpatient procedure was explained to me. They take a small slice and exam it under a microscope right then and there. They continue to take tiny slices until there is no more cancer. This is much more effective than the cut off a bunch and hope for the best procedure which a plastic surgeon would do.

The doctor knew I did not want to go to Manila since it would mean quarantining upon our return and poor Janet had just gotten out of quarantine. One thing that is good about me is that when it comes to major decisions which are unpleasant, I don’t hesitate. “I guess we’re going to Manila. What do I do?”

This is Part 1 and there will be more to come. I debated about whether to share this now, when it was all over, or not at all. In the end I opted to share because I fear (and have felt this throughout the pandemic) that there are millions of people who will avoid going to doctors or hospitals and have necessary medical procedures, treatments and tests done. In my jaded opinion this is due to the geniuses telling us what not to do and scaring the crap out of us so we don’t take care of other health concerns. And in some cases doctors and hospitals are flat out closed or not available for non-Covid treatment. Thank goodness my dermatologist was open. My encouragement to all of you is to take care of your health and not just your Covid health!

BTW, I am gonna make this Manila thing a fun holiday with a great hotel and the best restaurants and a serious mall shopping budget. So Janet and I expect to have fun!

Addendum: My purpose here is to: document my experience; describe medical experiences and costs here in the Philippines; and perhaps encourage people to take care of all their health issues. It is not to do a “woe is me” – so if you hear me doing that give me a gentle kick in the ass. Nor should anyone else proclaim “poor Dave and Janet” – or I’ll give you a gentle kick in the ass!

The Passing of Lolo

I have written about him before. Janet’s Grandfather, Lolo here in the Philippines, was probably my favorite family member. He didn’t speak a word of English and my Visayan is at best gamay (small) but I enjoyed seeing him every time I visited Janet’s family in Alcoy, Cebu. We had the same routine and everyone knew it. Janet would get a large bottle of San Miguel and we’d sit next to each other and share it with few words but many smiles.

Our Christmas routine was also set. Janet and I would visit Alcoy and when alone I would slip Lolo some cash. He was always very appreciative and I would hear later that he’d shared the proceeds with some of the grand and great grandkids.

As Lolo hit his late 80s his general health and spirits began to fail. Janet would encourage him, telling him she’d throw a big party for his 90th birthday and fly in some of his children who lived in Manila. Janet and I talked about this upcoming event many times; we were both looking forward to it when 2020 began.

Covid changed all that. As a senior, Lolo could not leave his house; neither could I. He could not understand why his children, grandchildren and great grandchildren could not visit him. By May the restrictions had been lifted enough to allow him to leave his house. But Janet and I could not travel to another island to be with him for the big day. Nor could his children in Manila. Nonetheless a 90th birthday party happened, sponsored by Janet. We promised Lolo that as soon as island to island travel was allowed we would have the promised big party. Yesterday that promise became irrelevant.

Over the past six months we had heard that Lolo’s spirits were flagging. All he wanted in life was to see his family, many of whom he could not see. He spoke sadly of it to his daughter (my mother in law) yesterday and then went to sleep; a sleep he never woke up from.

The family patriarch is gone and everyone is heartbroken. Janet, who kept hoping the travel restrictions would be lifted, is devastated that she could not see her Lolo one more time.

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We are trying now to arrange for her to go home for the funeral but in all likelihood she would be quarantined on arrival and miss the funeral. I have encouraged her to go anyway, since it seems clear to me that the restrictions are not ending anytime soon and she needs to see her family and they her.

Now, I could wrap up this blog with anger over the restrictions, the crazy attitudes toward our elderly, in the guise of saving them, and many other rants. That may come in a future blog but for now I won’t. I will just use this as a memory of a wonderful older guy who accepted and shared a beer with a new family member from 8000 miles away. I will miss you Lolo!

Depression

This is a touchy subject. Like many of my posts this year it’s not gonna be as light and funny as usual. Tougher still, my standard blogging method is to use examples from people we know. Since I don’t want to hurt or embarrass any friends or relatives I will try to speak generally, unpersonally or use examples from Janet’s and my life.

Let me start out with a horrible bombshell. A few days ago in Janet’s hometown a teenager committed suicide. This was the 3rd suicide of a school-aged child in her town since the quarantines began. How many school-aged children have died of Covid-19 in her town during the same period of time? I think you can guess the answer – none. What we are doing to our children in the name of “safety” is unconscionable.

Love him or hate him; and there seems to be no middle ground; Trump got one thing right from the beginning of the lockdowns: he warned that if extended the mental health and suicide consequences would be dire. I can say that in my own personal life and the lives of those around me this has been true.

The irony is that since the strictest quarantines have been lifted here in Dumaguete, depression has gotten worse. Janet and I can do most things almost normally; shop, go to the mall, eat at a restaurant, exercise (I play golf twice a week), etc. Despite the fact that most of our lives have returned to some sense of normalcy, depression among many of the people we know has gotten worse.

I suspect in some weird way that when the worst of the lockdowns ended in May, many of us assumed that normal life would return and when it did not – well the months have taken their toll.

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I know in my own life I have done and said things I would not normally do or say. I have done other things, like working on my guitar playing or golf game, that seem positive, but I don’t trust my judgment enough to be sure. And yes, in a few dark moments I have strongly considered suicide. Janet has been a fantastic help but she too readily admits to depression.

What’s really weird is this: now that I get together regularly with friends no one wants to talk about depression. Sure, we talk about Covid and the excesses of the government lockdowns and how we can’t wait to be able to travel again. But there is little talk about the difficulties with wives and families or the internal darkest times. I guess it’s a male thing. The media is the same. Lots of reporting about death or positive tests and some talk about the economy. But no discussion about the real mental and emotional impact on people’s lives. Very weird.

The exception is the children. As usual they are more honest than adults. School started last week in the Philippines but it is not in person. In fact, kids under the age of 21 are still in quarantine; unable to leave their homes. There are exceptions and gradually you see kids out and about a little bit. But the young kids we know admit that they miss school and don’t understand why they can’t go back and we’ve heard several expression of “I am sad…anxious… and depressed.” Kids and certainly teens know what these terms mean and it is horrible seeing children cope with the ramifications of not being able to play with other kids. It’s infuriating and IMO criminal.

I have no great conclusions here. Talk to your spouse; he or she is probably feeling the same. Talk to a mental health professional. And talk to your friends. No doubt they are experiencing similar feelings. That sounds like a good place to start. And since you’re all my friends – I’m starting with you!

Lockdown Consequences

If you thought this was gonna be a scathing indictment of the worldwide lockdowns, you will be disappointed. Sure, I think I could make an argument that many of the lockdown measures have been unnecessary, extreme and even Draconian, but this won’t be it. Will see whether FB slaps me down anyway.

The following are two stories, random really, about lockdown consequences. One is fairly trivial and one is serious.

———-

I’ve always had great eyesight. I was the kid who when we were driving could read a sign a couple hundred yards away. “How can you read that?” someone would ask. I’d shrug. I remember my mother taking me to an optometrist as a small child, who declared I was 20-20 (whatever that meant) and wouldn’t need glasses “until you are 40.” Since that was an infinite time away I thought, ‘I’ll never need glasses.’

Nonetheless by my mid-40s my ability to read the computer and newspaper seemed to be waning and after decades I reluctantly went to an optometrist. “Why are you here?” he asked after examining me. “You’re 20-20 (by now I knew what that meant).” I explained the problem I was having and he explained why I needed cheap reading glasses despite my perfect vision.

When Janet and I married we went to optometrists a couple times. The last time was three years ago, just before we moved to the Philippines. The doctor pronounced that we were both 20-20. “Which one of us has better eyesight?” Janet asked. The doc reluctantly admitted it was the ancient husband. I rubbed Janet’s nose in that one for awhile.

As the lockdown and quarantine has partially lifted here in Dumaguete, my buddies and I have returned to playing golf. Before Covid-19 became an insane part of our lives, our weekly game was a high point of my retired life. Today we returned.

The course’s first hole is a short 100 yard par 3. I hit a decent shot just off the green. I saw the ball fly all the way but when it landed 100 yard away I saw two balls. Everyone else hit their shots and as I focused on each white ball after landing, I saw two of each. OK, there’s a nasty joke in here, but I’m not writing it.

I blinked my eyes, shook my head and wondered what was wrong. I had no problem seeing trees or the flagstick or anything else; just looking at that tiny while ball in the distance seemed a problem. As the round proceeded I tried to focus on each ball in the distance. I had no problem seeing the ball in general. As always I could tell my companions, “your shot’s 10 feet left of the cup (ok that didn’t happen often).” After a while I wasn’t seeing double, I was seeing maybe 1 1/2 balls.

By now I had told my fellow players who expressed concern and suggested I go check it out. And I probably will do that when this is all a little closer to being over. By the 18th hole I was seeing almost normally; 1 ball and a slight blur. It then hit me. For two months I’d been indoors. I spent lots of time looking at computers and phones and TVs. Sure I’d gone out a bit and walked around. But I’d had no reason to focus on a small object 100-200 yards away. I hadn’t even driven, where focusing in the distance is important. So, for now I no longer have the best vision in the world. I wonder what else I’ve damaged with two months indoors.

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I’ve said often that I really like all of Janet’s family members. Not a bad one in the group. But, if I think about it, the person I like most (and don’t tell any other family members this) is Janet’s Lolo (Grandfather). His great grandchildren call him Lolo Old Guy (as opposed to Janet’s father, who is their Lolo/grandfather), which is pretty funny. He speaks no English but he was always very nice to me. Whenever I see him we share a beer. That is the extent of our relationship, which only proves that a relationship can be built on a very simple thing.

Lolo (from Janet’s mother’s side) turns 90 this Sunday. For the last couple years at least Janet has been telling him that she will throw him a big 90th birthday party with a couple pigs. In the Philippines the size and importance of a party is always defined by how many pigs you have. Janet reminds him of this often because we have all noticed that as he has aged he seems not as happy as before.

Last year he was sick in the hospital. The flu became pneumonia. They gave him oxygen and antibiotics. He talked about how it was his time to go. But it wasn’t. Slowly he recovered and went home. His strength was down but Janet reminded him he had to hold on for his huge 90th birthday party. Janet had also intended to fly in some of his children, who live in Luzon and no doubt cannot afford airfare.

And then Covid-19 and the quarantine came. Lolo, who always liked a daily walk, could not leave his house. He could not understand why his daughter (Janet’s mom) could not visit him, nor could his grandchildren or great grandchildren, all of whom live within a ten minute walk. Janet’s mom tried to explain but how do you explain viruses and quarantines to a 90 year old, who just wants to see his family.

He talks about the end and everyone tries to keep his spirits up and remind him of the party. Now that the lockdown has been relaxed a bit, Janet has come to the conclusion with my help, that it’s time for Lolo to take an occasional walk and carefully see some of his family. It’s the only thing he wants in life and at 90 he should have it.

I know that Janet is heartbroken that she cannot be there with him for his birthday. She tells her family that when travel between islands resumes we will have a real party; all of us together. But in the meantime this Sunday there will be a pig and we sent a video greeting.

And while I don’t tell Janet, not being there breaks my heart too.