Tag Archives: cash

Blog

Dating Filipina Scammers – It’s a “You” Problem

11 Comments

All you have to do to drive up traffic and controversy on your blog, You Tube vlog, forum, or in expat conversations is state that “Filipinas are scammers” or “they all will take advantage of you.” Others will nod their heads in agreement or sagely advise to “let’s be careful out there.”

Let me state my argument up front. In 90% of the cases it’s a “you problem.”

Now I am not trying to suggest that there are not “bad” women in the Philippines looking for cash, just as there are any place in the world.

But going back to my refrain that you’re gonna read often, so get used to it; generally it’s a “you problem.”

After all, you have all the advantages. You’re typically older (in my case much, much older) with the alleged wisdom that comes with age. You have a 1st worlder’s sophistication and a 1st worlder’s education. And even if you’re poor as a church mouse, by Philippines standards you’re rich – at least a little bit rich 🙂

And the Filipina friend you’ve been cultivating online? Young and inexperienced, unsophisticated, without that 1st world education. And let’s not forget she has no money, nor have her parents. So you have all the advantages, right? Well expect for the fact that she’s cute (or in the case of Janet more than just cute), sweet, treats you great, has a traditional sensibility. And oh, did I mention she’s pretty damn cute?

Barely a day goes by in which I don’t hear a tale of woe about some guy who sent money to a girl online, built her a house, paid the medical expenses for her parents or uncle, etc. Then he found out that she – wait for it – wanted his money.

I’ve said it before and I will say it again. This is the easiest problem in the dating world to navigate; don’t send any money to someone you have not met in person and are not in a serious relationship with. And if you choose not to heed that advise – it’s a “you problem.” And BTW, even after you have met and are in a relationship, stick to the common refrain “less is more.”

This is the easiest problem in the dating world to navigate; don’t send any money to someone you have not met in person and are not in a serious relationship with.

That being said, you could consider a “test” with a small amount of money. I did it with one of the women I was chatting with back in the day. She chatted online from an internet cafe, a pretty common occurrence in the Philippines. But she wasn’t online much; money was the obstacle. I finally proposed that I send her the princely sum of $20 on the condition that she use it solely for our chatting; you can chat a long time for 20 bucks in the Philippines. You can guess the outcome. A couple weeks later she finally got online and admitted she spent the money, probably on something foolish like food. For a tiny investment I had my answer and found a much better chat mate in Janet.

However, this can induce bruising so patients must be guided in order to get rid of cialis soft tablets such pain. According to recent stats, younger men are diagnosed with low-risk forms of viagra online consultation cancer may find that active surveillance is an option for them. The secretion of prostatic fluid is regulated by many different provisions and regulations. levitra generika 40mg Mechanisms of Zenegra The enzyme Sildenafil Citrate allows hard level inhibition of PDE5 enzyme which causes improvement of blood circulation in the penis erectile tissues called corpa cavernosa, levitra 60 mg thus creating an erection. When it comes to cash issues, the same is true after you get married. If you choose to shower your new wife with expensive gifts, send her siblings to the most costly university in Manila, buy her parents a yacht (ok, more likely an old pump boat), then you don’t get to complain afterwards that “she was just using me.” Once again – it’s a “you problem.”

Then there’s the refrain you often hear that all foreign women just want a green card. Right – cause every Filipina wants to live in a crazy place where we all just spent the last year arguing over Trump vs. Clinton 🙂

I’m not saying it doesn’t ever happen but I know 100+ Fil-Am couples living in my city and none of the women dumped their husbands the moment they got the green card. And believe me, with the exception of yours truly, none of these guys is exactly George Clooney.

And believe me, with the exception of yours truly, none of these guys is exactly George Clooney.

OK, I do know one couple that divorced and the green card was an issue. The guy is bright and successful but complained about the wife from the moment they married. Eventually he proposed they divorce but that he would allow her to get her 10 year green card first. Scammer that she was, she actually wanted to save the marriage; he didn’t. Well at least she got the green card.

Anyone who is an avid reader of this blog knows that I have made a mistake or two in my Philippines journey. I just thought it ridiculous to blame an entire country of women for the mistakes that I made. Well, that and the fact I still had lots of fun making those mistakes.

Now most of us are adults here. By that I mean that what you do is your choice. If you want to send money to a girl you haven’t met, or shower her  family with cash and prizes or any of a huge number of foolish things guys do when they’re around women; well, it’s your money and your decision. You have the right to do whatever you want. Just don’t complain afterwards about how “they” are all scammers.

So guys – be careful in dating, whether you begin online or in country. Get to know each other as best as you can. Visit her as often as you can. Take your time. But in the end, you’re the one with the age, sophistication, education and resources. If things don’t go the way you hoped – say it with me – it’s a “you problem.”

 

 

Blog

“When in Rome” Don’t be a Kano with your Cash

4 Comments

Here’s a bit of a tip that it’s taken me 7 or 8 trips to the Philippines to start to understand.

A few weeks ago we’re in Camiguin at Ardent Hot Springs. BTW, the Ardent pools are very nicely done and the cost of entry is cheap. The water is not hot – it’s bathtub warm, but do you really want 110 degree water during the summer in the Philippines?

So I am lazing in the hotspring and struck up a conversation with an Aussie of my age and his Filipina partner. Not sure if they were married or not and not sure that it matters.

Anyway, the conversation was about cash, retirement and cost differences between the Philippines and our home countries. His partner chimed in that the biggest mistake that “foreigners” make was that we too often “convert” to our own currency.

My first thought was to disagree. I am very good at math and grew up in an era where I actually learned to multiply and divide in my head without electronic assistance. Therefore, whenever I travel internationally I always quickly determine costs based on the almighty US Dollar.

But my new friend disagreed, stating that you must consider costs in pesos not dollars. I remembered a story I have told before about how Janet and I once argued about an overcharged taxi fare in Dumaguete and how I resolved that argument by saying, “Do you realize we are arguing about a fare that cost us $6.”

But now I have come to see the woman’s point and agree with it. If something normally costs 100 pesos you should not pay 300 pesos, despite the fact that from a USD standpoint the difference is tiny.

In other words, stop being a tourist and act like a Filipino, particularly if you want Filipinos not to treat you like a rich tourist.

Tips are a good place to start. I am old enough to recall a time in the US when tips at restaurants were based on good service, not on a set percentage of 15 or 20%. It is still that way in the Philippines. While I won’t tell you, dear reader, what kind of tip to give, I give a Philippines-appropriate tip.

Janet is particularly pointed in this regard. If the service is good she wants to make sure I gave the person a few pesos. If the service is poor she will ask me afterwards, “Did you give her a tip?” If my answer is yes, I get “the look!”
River shipping has a 70 to 1 advantage over any other form of transport. cialis generic canada djpaulkom.tv Through its wonder effects on men, it levitra free consultation has managed to attract both local and international clients. These herbal pills are available in the djpaulkom.tv purchase viagra online denomination of 180, 120, 60 and 240 capsules from reputed online stores. Do the same process sildenafil viagra generico with the other eye.
Many goods and services are negotiable in the Philippines. Hell, it’s almost insulting if you don’t negotiate. I usually throw out some kind of stupid line like “Is that your best price?” The price usually goes down without much argument. Do not feel that because the price is less than you would pay in your home country, that you are taking advantage of anyone. You are not! On the contrary, you are supporting them.

For example, like most old farts I like a massage once in a while. But I am too damn cheap to pay $60 – 100 for a massage in my home city. But it’s one of the things I look forward to in the Philippines, where even in a tourist trap like Boracay, a massage is $10 or less. Oops there I go again. Massages in Boracay are typically 350-500 pesos.

The first night we were in Boracay, I walked the boardwalk area and looked at massage prices. In general, the massage places on the beach are cheaper than the ones in spas by about 100 pesos. The next day I returned. As I say, since I am basically cheap, I was going to have one of the beach massages. But Janet and I passed a spa that looked very nice. I looked at the menu of prices. Massage – 550 pesos. I frowned and that’s all it took. The woman in charge noticed  my reaction and immediate said, “discount for you, sir. 400 pesos.” Sold! I asked whether they also did nails, since Janet wanted her nails done. Yes, I was told. “What’s your best price?” I asked. The price was magically reduced. Janet and I were led to a very pleasant room where we both lay on adjacent beds. I received a massage and Janet had her nails done. I spent an hour moaning while Janet laughed at me and spoke Visayan to the girl doing her nails. It was very pleasant, particularly since we paid an appropriate amount. The service was excellent and we tipped the women accordingly.

This concept of not converting currencies is not just applicable to inexpensive service items, like taxis or massages. It applies to everything. The housing market in my home town is pretty hot again. My buddy just bought a place and proudly announced that he’d gotten it by paying 15k more than the asking price. It’s great for him and his family, so don’t get me wrong.

OTOH, don’t do this in the Philippines, where the asking price for real estate is often an opening offer, no more valid than the 550 pesos that massage was supposed to cost.

Last year while we were in Alcoy, we stumbled across a very nice house for sale. The owner invited us in. Why not? We got the nickel tour and the place was in fact very nice. Out of politeness and curiosity I asked “how much?” “Six and 1/2 million pesos – firm,” I was told. “What about for cash?” I asked. “Oh for cash – six million.” Firm is apparently a fluid concept in the Philippines.

We left the house and I mistakenly gave the woman my local number. She assumed I was a real buyer and I got texts from her daily. It became annoying. Finally Janet laughed and said, “Just offer her 5 million.” I texted her back, “Sorry, but my wife says our budget is only 5 million.” I figured that would shut the woman up. Wrong! In less than five minutes I got a response, “We will accept 5 million, sir.”

So, think in pesos not dollars and remember, the price ain’t the price, and firm rarely is.

But also remember – that 5 million peso house sounds like a great deal, but only if the woman actually owns the house – another problem to consider in the Philippines.