All posts by Dave

Help! Fish are Eating Our Feet

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Pillazo Family Building Their House

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Why the Hell Would You Buy a Lot in the Philippines – PART 3

Part 1

Part 2

I had resisted the idea of buying a lot here in the Philippines for a long time. I wanted it easy and so leaned toward the idea of just buying an existing house.  While we saw a number of houses in the Valencia area, in most cases there was something that made each house a no go; the street, the layout, the lot size or shape, price, crazy owner, etc.

We found it difficult to find an agent who understood what we really wanted. They typically just sent us links to any house available in Valencia. We’d yell and say, “the lot is too small!” But the next listings we’d get sent would still be outside our parameters. Ironically, we ended up with a lot that was not the size we had targeted.

Tip 1: Use all the agents you want. You don’t have to feel married to any one agent. It’s more than possible they aren’t the official agent for a property anyway!

Now, there was one house within walking distance of our rental house which we liked. The lot was the size we wanted (1000 sq. mt.), the price was good, the house large enough, with the amenities we wanted, etc. It had been on the market for over 2 years. This is not unusual. Past a certain price, the houses can almost only be afforded by foreigners, therefore it’s not unusual for a house to remain on the market for a long time. After we came back from our recent trip to the U.S., we got more serious and said to ourselves, ‘Let’s see that house one more time and then make an offer.’ You can guess the rest. I contacted the agent only to be informed that earnest money had been put down on the house and it was sold.

So at that point, disappointed, we decided to build our own. The process of looking for a lot was actually a little bit easier than looking for a house. Many lots are available in Valencia and we had a few agents happy to show them to us. Lot prices here are always quoted by square meter and we saw quite a few lots with cheap prices. Almost invariably, if the price was cheap it meant the lot was too far out of town or only had right of way access to the road.

We currently live in what is the very beginning of Valencia. It’s only about 10-12 minutes away from Dumaguete and the Robinsons Mall that functions as our home away from home. Continue up the hill about 5 minutes and you are in Valencia Town. We decided that we preferred a lot somewhere between where we now live and Valencia Town or maybe a few minutes beyond the town. But many of the lots we were shown were 10-15 minutes beyond the town, meaning they were a good 1/2 hour away from civilization. That was a bit too provincial for us, though the views from that high up are beautiful.

The issue of right of way is even more important. Many inexpensive lots in the Philippines are sold off the road and there is a negotiated contract with the owner of the land that fronts the road. Often the lot is just a matter of a few meters off the road, but since we own a car, those few meters are important. We saw one lot in particular that was beautiful with a great view and equally great price, but the narrow 10 meters you have to go over someone else’s land to get there was a no go for me.

Tip 2: Think long and hard before you buy a lot with only a right of way access. It means you are connected to your neighbors forever. If they want to sing karaoke at 3:00AM you’re probably gonna let them 🙂

In the end we determined that being on a road was essential for us. It didn’t necessarily have to be paved but we had to have direct access to it.

Not long after the house we liked was sold, we were shown a lot just around the corner from it. The agent who showed it to us said it was “just under 1000 sq. meters.” Part of the lot was directly on the barangay road and there was a dirt road on another side of the lot. We spent a good half hour with the agent trying to determine the actual boundaries of the lot. In the Philippines surveyed lots have tiny stones to show the boundaries or even some natural stones in the ground might be used.

We liked what we saw, the price was decent and we were told it might be negotiable. The agent left and Janet and I hung out, imagining the layout of a house and whatever else we might want there. A few minutes later the agent returned with a copy of the title. The title showed the lot was 1355 sq. meters. “There’s no way this is 1355 sq. meters,” I said. We scratched our heads and then the agent realized that the piece of land behind where we thought the lot ended was actually part of the lot. The lot is boot-shaped with the wide portion at the barangay road. The rest is a very long strip, wide enough to build a lot of things (can you say workshop) but a bit narrow for the size of house we wanted. But the foot portion of the boot would be perfect.

We liked the lot, liked the recently paved barangay road, liked the quiet neighborhood, and liked the fact that the two roads made it sort of a corner lot.

A day or two later we met with the agent and a man who was introduced to us as the nephew of the owner. We started negotiating with him as if he was the owner. I was nervous about the fact that suddenly I was considering a lot that was a third larger than our goal. The per meter price was reduced a bit, which made us feel better. We told the nephew what documents we needed to make the deal and he assured us that his uncle had them all. I told the nephew that once we had a deal I could have the money in our Philippines bank in about a week and therefore I considered the matter of earnest money to be unnecessary. He agreed. But of course the negotiating was all moot, since this guy wasn’t really the owner.

Tip 3: Learn to negotiate with the agent or the owner’s relative but understand in the end it doesn’t mean shit till the owner agrees.

A few days later the agent called us to tell us that the owner was coming to town (he lives in Manila) to bring the documents and asked did we want to meet him. In the U.S. seller and buyer rarely meet but here it’s standard so we said, “sure.”

Later that week the owner and his posse came to our rental house. In tow were the agent, the nephew and the owner’s brother. The owner was about 70 and seemed far more interested in letting us know that his son was a famous Filipino actor, than dealing with the lot. But gradually we hammered out the details. This was very difficult since all 4 men were functioning as if they were “the man” and I was confused as to what we were actually agreeing to and with whom.

I mentioned to the owner what I had discussed with the nephew; that once we were settled I would wire the money from our U.S. bank and have it in our Philippines account in about a week. The owner looked around at his posse incredulously. “I was told you had the money now and we could do this all today.” The nephew and agent looked like they would very much rather be somewhere else. It was an interesting insight into Filipino psychology since no one took responsibility for misinforming the owner nor did anyone say, “Gee I think you must have misunderstood.”
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Being the American I just hit it head on. “No, I don’t have the money yet, though I can get it quickly. But we don’t have all the documents nor have we drawn up a deed of sale. So there’s no way we can do anything now.” It was agreed that once we had everything together the owner’s brother would let him know and he would come back to Dumaguete.

Fortunately he had all the required documents although one of them was still in the name of the previous owner from almost 30 years prior. Turned out that took a few days to resolve.

Tip 4: If the documentation is not all there or close to being ready consider walking.

We had a deal and Janet and I felt pretty good; that is until later that afternoon when the agent returned and said, “A lawyer recommended that the owner get earnest money. But don’t worry. He doesn’t want very much.”

I exploded, “We agreed there would be no earnest money. And how much is not very much?” I asked that question several times before I got a meek answer. “Maybe 50,000 pesos.” “That sounds like very much to me,” I said.

Nonetheless, the next morning we met the owner and his posse at a local restaurant/outdoor cafe. I had in the meantime been able to withdraw the required earnest money from our ATM. Even though I knew that earnest money was a reasonable request I was not thrilled that they had gone back on one of the things we’d agreed to. I was also not too thrilled to be handing over 50,000 pesos to some codger that I didn’t know in a public place. Janet had spent much of the previous evening writing an earnest money agreement which everyone signed. Janet and I went away from the meeting saying to each other, “well, I guess we have a lot.”

Tip 5: Until the deed of sale has been signed and the money exchanged you don’t really have a firm deal. Decide what you can and can’t live with if things change.

Over the course of the next week there was a certain amount of drama surrounding the obtaining of all the documentation. The owner’s brother was our communications point, since the owner made it clear that he just wanted to sign the papers and get paid. The brother was my age and just as cranky. The owner had told me that his brother loves to drink. Perhaps that was his way to let us know I’d be having problems with the brother. There were in fact a couple of stressful moment where Janet and I looked at each other and said, “if this doesn’t happen, we’ll ask for the earnest money back and cancel all this.”

But it did all happen. One of the things the brother insisted on was that they wanted cash. Our bank manager had suggested a Manager’s Check, but brother was having none of it. I was to find out why the day we closed.

In the meantime we found a lawyer and gave him the documentation to draw up a deed of sale. The seller had already agreed to pay the taxes if we paid all the fees associated with the transfer of the title. The lawyer suggested that he would calculate the tax and we would minus the tax cost off of what we would pay the seller and then just pay the taxes ourselves. That way we knew the taxes had been paid.

The big day came. Janet and I were anticipating problems with the owner and his brother and committed to each other that if they’d try to change the deal we’d get up from the table  and tell them the deal was off. Such a stance was unnecessary. They were both tame as pussy cats; probably too excited for the cash to come. I asked once again if the owner really wanted cash, because once he left my bank..and I held up my hands. Turns out the owner was sharper than his brother and had hired a van and driver to make sure they got safely from our bank to his bank. And then he told me the truth. “I know a Manager’s Check is a good idea, but it takes a day to clear and everyone wants their money in cash today and I have a lot of mouths to feed.”

The documents signed, an hour later we were at my bank. It took some time for the bank to get the cash ready and the owner and posse were impatient.

While we waited for the money the owner felt confident enough (well, that’s one word for it) to tell me how much he’d paid for the property over 25 years before. It was all classified as agricultural back then and he’d paid absolute chump change. I congratulated him on the profit he’d made.

Finally the cash arrived bundled in plastic; the kind of bundle you see in drug deals in movies. It turns out that in the Philippines there’s no bill for all intents and purposes greater than a 1000 peso note (about $20). There were a hell of a lot of 1000 peso notes. The owner threw the plastic bundled cash in a bag, we shook hands and off he went.

I was later told that he’d spent much of the rest of the day doling out pesos. I suspect there were a few seriously celebrating Filipinos that night.

And yes – a Part 4 is coming!

 

 

Why the Hell Would You Buy a Lot in the Philippines – PART 2

In Part 1, I discussed some of the reasons that guys cannot and should not buy lots in the Philippines. Since Janet and I have purchased not one, but two lots here, I thought I would discuss why and how it all came about.

When Janet and I married in the U.S. we had many discussions about how she wanted to help her family. Whether married or in a serious relationship with a Pinay, you will discover that she is driven, like salmon going upstream to spawn, to help her family. Guys who think otherwise are  delusional. Nonetheless, how to help and how much is very much subject to negotiation, debate and sometimes even argument; but whether or not you are going to help should be accepted as a done deal.

After many such discussions (but hopefully not too many arguments)  it turned out that Janet’s greatest desire was to help her family by buying a lot and ultimately building a house for them. As the practical and wise (aka old) Westerner I stuck to the nuts and bolts; how much could a lot be purchased for in Southern Cebu. I encouraged Janet to save monthly from her paycheck and that I would help her do so. To her surprised (though not mine) she hit her goal every month for 2 1/2 years and saved the targeted amount of money. As I’ve said before, I am very proud of her!

In the meantime every time we came back to the Philippines, we looked for property. This is a very different process while living in the U.S. Yes, there are real estate agents, particularly in the larger cities, but in the Provinces, it’s much more like someone knows someone who’s knows someone who is a cousin to someone who might want to sell a lot, though it’s not listed anywhere.

The first lot we saw was owned by neighbors of Janet’s parents. I knew enough about the Philippines to know that clear title is very important. Often 5 or 10 people jointly own the property so getting clear title can be difficult if not impossible. The sellers said they were the owners and could come up with the title. “Great!” we said. The price was right and the lot was more than adequate. We left the Philippines thinking we might have found the lot. But the next week, the owners came to Janet’s parents and asked them for 5000 pesos – money they needed to come up with the title. That ended our interest in that lot and sellers.

The next year we saw an even better lot. It was much too large for our purposes but the owner agreed to cut off a piece of the lot and have the proper title created. Again, we were excited. The lot had a view of the ocean; hell, I would have liked it for myself. Again, we returned to the U.S. thinking we had found the one.

Communications with the “owner” were difficult and finally he told us that he actually wasn’t the owner; his brother was. His brother, we were told, lived in the U.S. “Great,” I said. “Then give me his phone number and I will call him.”

“No, you can’t do that,” said the brother. “But not to worry. The owner’s wife is here in the Philippines and she has Power of Attorney.”

“So let me get this straight, ” I said. “You’re not the owner but I have to negotiate with you and the documents will be signed by the real owner’s wife, even though he lives in the U.S.?”

“Right.”

“No thanks,” we said, and that was that. Of course we were eventually to realize that you almost never deal with the real owner (assuming there’s only one) initially.  In the future when meeting an “owner” my first question was always “are you the true owner?” and if the answer was ‘yes’ came back with, “are you the only owner?” Rarely did I get a ‘yes’ answer to both questions.

Tip 1: Make sure in buying property you are dealing with the owner or the owner’s representative. However, understand that if you are not it doesn’t necessarily mean the situation is fatally flawed, though it often is.

After our two failures buying property in Cebu, Janet and I determined that we would wait until we actually lived in the Philippines before trying again. That proved to be a wise decision.

Tip 2: Think long and hard before buying property in the Philippines while you are located in your home country.

Shortly after Janet and I moved to Dumaguete, Janet’s mother told her of property available. The lot was large but the “owner” was willing to parcel out a segment. Janet and her parents knew the “owner” and we went to Southern Cebu to look at the lot. The price was right, the lot was adequate, and the “owner” allowed Janet to select the 500 sq. meters she wanted and we left with a verbal agreement. Things were actually progressing.

It is a buying viagra in canada medical condition when a man is unable to get erection. The pill will not http://amerikabulteni.com/2012/01/16/wikipedia-go-dark-on-wednesday-to-protest-sopa-progress-in-congress/ discount viagra work and get you erections only by grabbing the pill. It implies that she is at least one type of therapy that does go to the root causes of impotence? order viagra does not cure erectile dysfunction. cialis does not solve the root causes of male impotence, although if the cause is primarily psychological, it may help to get strong erection naturally as it reduces the problem of poor alertness and poor brain functions. Stress leads to various amerikabulteni.com levitra price in india problems in the life of a man. Janet was determined to do things right and completely legal. This is by no means always done in the Philippines. As I suggested earlier, the owner doesn’t always have the legal title and the documentation necessary to get the legal title is extensive. Janet had done her research and we had consulted with an attorney. Janet sent the “owner” a list of the documents we required to transfer ownership to Janet. The owner said “no problem.”

But it was a problem. We made it clear that as soon as Janet had all the documentation, we would have an attorney draw up a deed of sale and pay cash for the lot. Yet weeks went by before the “owner” provided any of the half dozen or so requirement documents. The first thing the “owner” provided was a copy of the title; a copy that showed that he was not the actual owner – his daughter was. Dramatic texts went back and forth explaining why his daughter was the actual owner on record; in fact the original owner had been the man’s mother who passed it along to her granddaughter before she died.

Janet and I considered whether to run from the deal but the explanation made a weird sort of Philippines-style sense and besides, Janet had already spent a little bit of money, since the man we now realized was the owner’s father had insisted that Janet pay for the official survey of the property.

It took nearly 6 months for the man to come up with all the documentation necessary to draw up a deed of sale. Janet was furious at his procrastination and he was furious with Janet, always saying that “no one else is asking for all these documents.”

Just a couple weeks before we were ready for the signing Janet got a weird message from the “actual owner” (the daughter). They wanted more money, to compensate them for the extra expenses they had to come up with the documents. Janet angrily replied that we had a deal and the deed of sale and all documentation had already been written at the sale price. Janet asked if this meant the deal was off if we didn’t pay more. “Yes,” she was told.

Even more angry Janet replied that, “We’ve already paid thousands of pesos for the survey and a lawyer!” Surprisingly the “real owner” replied that they would refund that survey expense and if Janet’s mother went to her father’s (the previously considered owner) store he would give it to her.

The next day, Janet’s  mom went to the store to get the refund. The father said, “Don’t worry. We’re going through with the deal.”

A couple weeks later we signed the documents in front of an attorney. The daughter looked pissed, the father looked pissed, Janet looked pissed, and I sure as hell was pissed. Directly after the signing I announced to Janet, “I’m getting a drink.”

—————————————-

When you buy property in the Philippines there are a few fees and taxes involved in the transfer of title. There is a Capital Gains Tax of 6% and a Documentary Stamp Tax of 1.5%. Now while who pays this is negotiable between seller and buyer in this case because of the cheap price Janet had agreed to pay the taxes.

The taxes are paid at the local Bureau of Internal Revenue (BIR) and the rule is that you must pay the greater of: the sale price on the Deed of Sale; or the assessed value of the property. Unfortunately when Janet went to the BIR she found out that the assessed value of the lot was higher than the actual sale price. Ca-Ching!

Tip 3:  Make sure you know what the tax will cost and who will pay it, to avoid surprises.

But Janet paid and we did now own a lot in the Philippines.

In Part 3, I’ll describe how we bought a lot for Janet and I to live in. Yes, this is becoming an epic tale.

 

 

Why the Hell Would You Buy Property in the Philippines – Part 1

Janet has purchased not one, but two lots in the year since we moved to the Philippines. You notice I don’t say that we’ve purchased two lots, since as most people know a foreigner cannot own real estate in the Philippines.

Now, whether you are living as an expat in the Philippines or are living in your home country with a Filipina wife and considering purchasing property in the Philippines, let’s face it – you can do whatever the hell you want – you don’t need my permission. But a lot of people have strong views on this, so let’s dig into them.

A lot of guys are very passionate about only renting in the Philippines. After all, outside of the two main metro areas in the country, apartment and home rentals are generally cheap. Our rental home in Valencia is probably 1/4 – 1/3 of the price a similar house would rent for in our previous home in Portland. On the flip side you could probably purchase a home here for the same percentage compared to a comparable Portland house.

There are a few reasons you probably should not buy property in the Philippines:

  1. You’re on death’s door. Let’s face it – a 70-year old in poor health moves here – he’s got no reason to buy anything more expensive than a case of San Miguel Pilsen.
  2. You’re not committed to the Philippines or the city or town you live in. This requires more self-awareness than most of us expats have. Have you moved to the Philippines for good or just until your neighbor sings karaoke too loud or your Viagra supply runs out? Since high end property is difficult to sell here, such  a guy should again stick to investing in San Miguel.
  3. Are you committed to your girl and she to you? Since only Philippines citizens can own property, in all likelihood your girl will own the lot. Sure sure, you can technically own the house on top of the lot, lease the lot for 99 years from your girl, set up a corporation, and a million other schemes expats claim are foolproof. To quote Oscar Schindler in Schindler’s List, when the Jewish investors who lent him money wanted a contract, “Enforced by what court?” Once again if you’re not 100% committed to your girl and she to you – stick to investing in San Miguel.
  4. You don’t have a pot to piss in. A mortgage is not easy to get here for a jobless expat and even if you could get one, mortgage rates are high. Therefore most expats who buy or build houses here use this weird, old fashioned thing called cash. If you don’t have any – rent’s the way to go.
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So why did Janet, from a poor family, dream of owning property; a dream that long predated her marriage to me. Her parents rented the lot she grew up on. Because it was a rented lot with the associated fear that someday they’d get kicked off, they built a simple native home; no permanent, concrete structure on a rented lot.

So her dream, like that of many Filipinos was about the family; that they’d live in a real house on a real piece of property that she’d own. While in the U.S. she saved and saved (I’m very proud of her) to accomplish her dream.

Why did I want to buy or build a home for Janet and I? Because I am old fashioned enough (or just plain old enough) to believe that that’s the best way to live. Also because I delusionally hope to have enough years left to  live in a bit of a dream house. And also still because I want to leave Janet a nice home after I am gone; a place she can do whatever she wishes. And besides, I built up enough equity from the last house I had in the U.S. to pull it all off.

So those are our reasons. There are no right or wrong reasons. Well, actually there are right and wrong reasons; it’s my blog so by definition my reasons are right 🙂

More about the drama surrounding how we bought those two properties and lived to tell the tale in Part 2 of this saga.

One “Starving” Dog in the Philippines

One issue that angers many expats in the Philippines is the way they perceive dogs are treated here. I have a different view which may piss a few people off – but we’ll get to that.

When Janet and I first moved into our rental house in Valencia there were a handful of dogs that roamed the street. They’re often referred to as askals. One in particular was tiny, bony and emaciated. He looked like he hadn’t had a good meal in forever and would be no match for the other dogs when it came to fighting over scraps. We saw him regularly for a couple months, and almost ran over him a couple of times. Eventually we stopped seeing him and speculated that he’d passed away.

There are untold numbers of stray dogs here plus millions of dogs with owners who nonetheless live most of their lives outdoors, returning home for the occasional table scraps, if table scraps are available. In a country in which millions of people struggle to feed their families it should come as no surprise that animals aren’t lavished with streaks and kibble.

The reality is that outside the two major cities, the Philippines is an agrarian country. If I take a 10 minute walk on my suburban street on any given morning I will pass by 10 cows, an equal number of goats, pigs, countless chickens and roosters, occasionally a horse, and a large number of dogs and cats. They are outside, roaming the streets, making noise, doing what animals do. The cows and goats are usually (but not always) tied up. Animals graze wherever their owners take them, which sometimes means somebody’s lot. Janet and I are in the process of purchasing a lot (more on that in the future) and we have visited said lot to see a couple of cows happily grazing there. Since no cow pooper scoopers exist, we have to tread cautiously.

In my experience most people do their best to care for their animals but their best might not be up to Western standards and frankly animals here are treated like animals. People in the Philippines generally buy animals for economic or gastrointestinal reasons (aka – to eat). Janet’s father has roosters and chickens and  takes very good care of them but once in a while we will be having dinner and Janet will mention that dinner is one of Dad’s chickens.

So let’s get back to the title of this opus, One “Starving” Dog in the Philippines. When we first moved to the Philippines about a year ago I noticed that there was a dog hanging around Janet’s family home. He looked to be in bad shape, all skin and bone and ribs. Knowing Janet’s family it was hard to believe they would let a dog starve. In fact her family is very generous and I have never had a meal there in which at least one child from the neighborhood wasn’t also eating. In short no one is ever turned away. I finally mustered up the courage to cautiously ask Janet what was the story with the dog; I didn’t want her to feel that I was insulting her family, but by that point I was used to seeing hungry dogs in the Philippines.

“He used to be my Lolo’s (grandfather’s) but he was given to my Dad.” Lolo is now 89 and had gotten to the point that he could no longer care for the dog. At some point the dog got into a fight with another dog and was on the losing end of the affair and was carved up pretty severely. Janet said the fight was over a female dog who was apparently ger gering (take a wild guess) both combatants! It’s the way of the world for every species; men fighting over women whom they get or hope to ger ger.

Now there is no way in hell that Janet’s family can afford a veterinarian, let alone surgical procedures on a dog. So it was determined that the dog would be allowed to fend for itself. He would either survive or he would not. Over the months the dog’s gained weight and now looks like a normal Philippines dog, which means he runs into the house and everyone yells and shoos him out 🙂
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I also have to add that instead of judging we should remember that it wasn’t much different years back in my home country.  I am old enough to remember the dog catchers picking up strays. Even as a kid I was sharp enough to know they weren’t taking them for a home cooked meal. Even today in the US, 2.7 million animals are euthanized annually because no one adopts them. So it’s a problem everywhere. We’re just able to hide it in pounds and animal shelters and dispose of the unwanted.

Growing up, my concept of the ultimate dog was Lassie.  Now there was a dog! But Lassie lived on a farm, where she had free reign, as well as free reign over the entire town. There didn’t seem to be anything that happened in that community that Lassie didn’t know about, often running back to grab that idiot Timmy to save someone.  That was our image of idyllic life in the 50s and our image of how a dog should live.

Today, dogs in the US may be spoiled but they live cooped up indoors, mostly seeing the light of day for their morning daily walk/crap. I wrote in my last blog entry, Noise Pollution in the Philippines, about how I had fenced in my yard so that my dog would have a nice play to run, play and bark, only to find out that many neighbors weren’t thrilled with a running, playing and barking dog. Of course she was well fed. But just as I am living a life now in the Philippines where I might be subjected to more risk and a shorter but happier life, I can’t help but speculate whether my dog would have been happier as an outdoor Lassie rather than a fat and slightly lonely American.

All this said, the sight of malnourished dogs does sadden me, just as the sight of a malnourished child saddens and horrifies me. But I know there’s no one easy person or persons to point the finger at.

 

 

 

Noise Pollution in the Philippines

When expats complain about the Philippines (a favorite activity here) many of the complaints fall under the general category of “noise pollution.”

By comparison to their Western home countries, noise pollution is everywhere and includes: every animal in the Philippines, karaoke, loud stereos, excessive horn usage, and even loud talking. Some Westerners, used to the quiet  of their country of origin (a quiet enforced by the cops), struggle with a society that makes no attempt to remain quiet. Frankly, quiet here is downright un-Filipino.

When I hear expats complain about noise pollution my first thought is ” did you visit the Philippines before you moved here?” There is not a corner of this country in which you will not be awakened to the sound of roosters. I always loved the Dylan line, “When the roosters crow at the break of dawn, look out your window and I’ll be gone.” Dylan doesn’t know squat about roosters. They don’t crow at dawn; they crow whenever the hell they feel like it.

Frankly, I like roosters. When I would visit the Philippines as a tourist I would love the roosters on the first morning. It felt like I’d arrived home. OK, let’s acknowledge that I’m nuts.

Dogs are ubiquitous here. People let them roam their property or roam the streets. They bark like, well, dogs. They shit where they want. This is sort of the way it was when I was a kid in the U.S. (yes, I am that old). Pooper scoopers did not exist. People did not walk my neighborhood with their dog in tow and a plastic baggie on their hands. As a pedestrian it was your responsibility to avoid the dog shit. I guess some people think it’s progress.

And back then dogs barked. As a kid there was a German Shepherd two doors from us. When you passed their home the damn Nazi barked at you and slammed into the front window, testing it for weaknesses. Few kids in the neighborhood ever went into their home, despite the fact that the family daughter was smoking hot. During the summer she occasionally came to our place to swim in the pool. No way I was going to her place no matter how good she looked in a bathing suit.

When I was a middle aged divorced dad with two kids, I bought a dog for the kids. Spent real money to fence in the back yard for the dog. She loved it and when I took her out there she ran and ran and barked her head off. The other neighborhood dogs in their fenced in yards barked as well. They were having a high time. That is until I got the call or text from a neighbor telling me that my dog was barking and they were having difficulty concentrating on Masterpiece Theater. I liked my neighbors so in came the dog. If she was lucky she got a half hour run/bark session. I know what you’re thinking – why didn’t I take her to a dog park like every other responsible dog owner. Because I had spent $300k for my own home so that dogs and kids and possums and squirrels could act like animals and kids.

In the Philippines if you tell your neighbor that his dog is barking too much and keeping you from enjoying Antiques Roadshow they will react by…well I don’t know but I sure want to be there to see it!
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Karaoke and music: If you’re married to a Pinay you certainly should be aware of the country’s love for singing and music. There’s simply no understanding the concept that it disturbs your peace any more than the concept that it’s your neighbors’ fault if you stepped in his dog’s crap.

I know guys who have complained to neighbors about late night singing, though come to think of it, I haven’t heard from them lately. It might be cheaper and better for your health to buy a good pair of noise cancelling ear buds.

Motorcycle and car horns: I have written about this but horn usage is the primary method of vehicular communication in the Philippines. People honk to tell you they’re passing. People honk to tell you they’d like to pass but can’t till you get the hell out of the way. People honk at night to tell you that’s it’s cheaper to honk at you rather than turn on their headlights.

People honk in front of our house a lot. It’s the one thing Janet does not like about our rental home. Our bedroom is very close to the road. The road curves there and it’s sort of a blind curve, so drivers honk before entering the curve just in case someone is coming the other way. It’s very polite of them really, except Janet wakes up and wants to do a lot more than honk at them; I suspect a bolo would be involved.

And finally, Filipinos can be loud. They are friendly and fun loving people and as they walk by your home they are talking, giggling laughing, singing and just having fun. Unfortunately they are not thinking, “Gee, I bet that foreigner is watching Masterpiece Theater. We’d better be quiet.”

Personally I prefer happy people making a bit of noise rather than quiet miserable people. I’d rather roosters do their thing (on my street I am just as likely to wake up to cows mooing than roosters crowing). There’s a lot worse things to hear at night than singing. Fortunately I’m a good sleeper and do own a pair of noise cancelling ear buds.